Every community has that guy.

You know the one — the fella who thinks owning a WhatsApp group automatically makes him a comedian. The man who treats dad jokes like they’re a public service. The human equivalent of a Christmas cracker that never quite bangs.

For us, that man is Hightower.

By day, he’s allegedly stacking shelves in Aldi with the same energy he brings to his punchlines — slightly confused, mildly chaotic, and occasionally in the wrong aisle. By night, however, he transforms into DoddyTheViking’s resident “comedian,” a title he awarded himself after making Rosie Jones look like a Netflix special.

Hightower doesn’t just tell jokes.
He commits to them.
Relentlessly.
Like a man who’s never read the room but insists on renting it anyway.

His humour sits somewhere between “so bad it’s good” and “so bad we’re filing a report.” And yet… somehow… we keep listening. Maybe it’s morbid curiosity. Maybe it’s community spirit. Maybe we just enjoy the chaos.

Either way, in the spirit of fairness (and public awareness), here are Hightower’s Top 20 Dad Jokes — presented exactly as the man would want: with zero shame and maximum groaning.

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Hightower’s Top 20 Dad Jokes

1. Doctor: You could have a stroke at any time
   Me: Well that escalated quickly…
2. Paid a carpenter £400 to build a double bed…
   He’s done a bunk.
3. To whoever stole my antidepressants —
   I hope you’re happy now.
4. Someone stole my trainers and high-vis vest…
   You can run, but you can’t hide.
5. Got sacked from the perfume factory…
   I was scent packing.
6. Selling my old “dogging gear” on eBay…
   12 people watching, no buyers.
7. Blackpool Zoo had a cage full of baguettes…
   Bread in captivity.
8. Fell off a ladder yesterday…
   Been up and down all night.
9. My wife’s leaving me over my Linkin Park obsession…
   But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.
10. Found out I’m colourblind…
    Came out of the green.
11. Peek-a-boo accident…
    Recovering in I C U.
12. Looking for George Michael jokes?
    I’m your man.
13. Why learn maths until 18?
    What difference does 3 years make?
14. My budgie escaped and now my dog’s had puppies going cheep.
15. Growing up poor — at KFC I had to lick other people’s fingers.
16. According to Asda’s cheesecake, I’m a family of four.
17. Drank a bottle of invisible ink…
    Now waiting to be seen.
18. First-class stamp on my forehead…
    I’ll keep you posted.
19. My mate’s addicted to seaweed…
    Told him to seek kelp.
20. Kicked out for my Arnold Schwarzenegger impression…
    Don’t worry — I’ll return.

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Final Verdict

Is Hightower funny?
Debatable.

Is he persistent?
Absolutely.

Is he proof that confidence can carry a joke further than quality ever could?
100%.

And truth be told, every community needs a Hightower — someone to keep the chat alive, the groans flowing, and the standards questionably low.

Because sometimes the worst jokes bring the best laughs… even if it’s at him, not with him.

Long live the Aldi aisle assassin.